Nebulous Recollections

sigh

Saturday, October 31, 2009

Sometimes when "it's just not my day", the day might mean a day on some planet that's not rotating.

åé¥±é¥æ²¡äºå at 1:13 PM

A Fleeting Taste of Sweetness

Thursday, October 29, 2009

Over the years, I've accumulated a library of blockbuster-like dreams, where I was always a guileless young hero with the onerous task of saving the world. In these dreams, sometimes I had superhero powers, while other times, I was just an ordinary denizen of this complicated world. What remained invariant was my strong conviction that the world will be a better place if I played my part, whether it is battling hideous-looking monsters, or smacking evil villains.

Two night ago, I had a dream. There were no blockbuster fighting scenes. It was just a simple dream. I dreamt I was lying on some open ground taking a rest, oblivious to the surroundings. Then, to my pleasant surprise, somewhere from behind, I felt someone's arms embracing me. Turning around, I saw her cheeky grin, and knowing that she just gave me a surprise hug, my heart melted. I couldn't control my smile, and I probably looked foolish smiling to myself, basking in delightful joy and happiness.

Much as I wanted to flood her with sweet words, I knew she was a shy person, and I wasn't sure how she would respond if I really did that, so I didn't. Worrying that her shyness would take over, and make her feel embarrassed for giving me a hug in the open, I asked her, "what if others see?" She responded with an assuring "it's ok", and to my surprise, she then gave me a peck on the lips. My heart melted again. I hugged her tighter, and at that moment, I really wished time stood still. As I embraced her, that warm happiness I felt was indescribable. There she was, someone so very special and important to me, in my arms, and I knew I would exchange anything in the world just to make her happy.

It was the sweetest dream I had in years. This is the second time I've dreamt of her, and incidentally, this is one of the few times in recent months that I woke up in the midst of a dream. Alas! It is just a dream. In the real world, I have no idea how she feels, and I dare not ask her, for I know she needs time and space. And even after all the time and space she needs, she may choose to move on with life, in a world of happiness without me. All I can do is to meet her in my dreams, and in the waking hours, look forward to entering dreamland once again.

åé¥±é¥æ²¡äºå at 2:29 AM