Dragon Question
Wednesday, November 29, 2006
Speaking of dragons, I ever gave a sadistic-sounding problem to the IMO National team before, which has quite a morbid storyline.
A dragon has 100 heads initially. A knight can cut off 15, 17, 31, or 5 heads each time with one blow of his sword. In each of the cases, 24, 2, 13, or 17 new heads grow on the dragon's shoulders respectively. At any point in time, if the dragon has less than 5 heads, then the knight is unable to cut heads. His sword will miss, and 999 more horrendous heads will grow on the dragon's shoulders! If all the heads are cut off, the dragon dies. Can the dragon ever be killed by our knight?
Those who find this question trivial/obvious, please do NOT reveal the answer!!
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11:27 PM
Dragon Slain
Sunday, November 26, 2006
Just a while ago, at about 3am, I have finally slain the dragon, sending it to its proper resting place. Finally, no more burnt asses, and no more worrying about becoming dinner. I am one happy warrior. I still have an even bigger dragon to slay though. It's called "economic sociology final paper".
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3:27 AM
Dragons
Friday, November 24, 2006
It is the age of the dragons. I am a fighting warrior, out on my daily stroll into the wilderness, ready to combat all sorts of evils and atrocities the world had. In particular, I was looking to fight this dragon who was known to the peasants only as "Writer's Block". I need not look long in the wilderness before I felt a rise in the temperature of the surrounding air. Turning round, I managed to catch a glimpse of the dragon hurling breaths of fire towards me as I jumped and rolled to the side, brandishing my sword with pride. Yet, this mighty azure dragon possessed the ferocity of a thousand lions, and every time I charged towards it with my sword, its fiery breath prevented me from getting close. I must defeat the dragon! Don't give up.
I am supposed to write an essay on Masculinity and Mathematics, a topic that I chose MYSELF. My subconscious mind was probably cursing and swearing for choosing such a difficult topic to write, but I was probably drawn towards it like how flies cannot resist the blue electric light. The original argument I had was bold - that mathematics was masculine. I knew that by writing such an essay, I would incur the wrath of any staunch feminist, and I would probably be burnt at the stake alive for even having such chauvinist thoughts. But it was my TA, a female, who actually suggested writing on that topic, and she asked me to argue that Mathematics is masculine. Intrigued by how mathematics and gender could blend to form an essay, I took up the challenge.
Dragon-fighting is an occupational hazard I guess. No matter how much courage I can muster to face the dragon, the story was just the same. It would breathe out fire at me every once in a while. Not wanting to be fried warrior on dinner table, I turned around and ran for my life, but the flames would always find my ass. Ouch! With a burnt ass, I had no idea how to attack this bloody dragon.
I wrote my first draft, with the evidence clearly lacking, but at least there was an outline of the argument I would use. As part of class, we exchanged our first drafts and criticized each other's writings. What I found out was nothing new. I didn't sound convincing enough. But of course! I wasn't totally convinced myself.
As I faced the dragon and tried all sorts of acrobatic stances to fight it, I found that my sword reflected the bright sunlight that blinded the dragon momentarily. Good! Now I know how to distract it. It should buy me some time.
I asked for an extension for my essay, and I discussed with my TA the difficulties of writing on such a topic. The discussion enlightened me, and I knew how to make my essay more manageable. I decided to adopt a feminist stand and argue that the systematic discrimination of the academic institutions makes it very hard for women to enter mathematics as a profession.
As I blinded the dragon with my sword, I took a big stab into the mighty dragon, and finally, I saw blood gushing out of its open wound, reminding me that the dragon was after all flesh and meat, not some invincible monster you see in some sadistic computer game.
With an essay due next week, I can feel the stress creeping in slowly again. Luckily, as I squeeze my brain juices for inspiration, I finally found a few drops of it. A new outline of my essay began to take shape, and I knew what to argue. After suffering a huge set-back from my first draft, I started writing again.
As I stab the dragon a few times, I could hear roars of pain, and I knew I had injured it. But a strange thing happened. The dragon suddenly stopped, and as it frowned and concentrated, those open wounds that I so painstakingly inflicted on it were magically healing on its own. Oh gosh! Was I facing some Wolverine-hybrid dragon that could heal itself?? Shit.. this means trouble.
I found myself stuck after writing a few sentences. Again, I didn't know how to continue. Damn.. So what exactly did I want to argue? How was it linked to the Women's Movement in the early 20th century? How do I link the ideas I had without making my essay seem so disembodied?
The fight carries on. The dragon continues to spew flames, buring my ass again and again. Stupid dragon.
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1:39 AM
Cantor's Dilemma
Thursday, November 23, 2006
After spending hours reading "Cantor's Dilemma", a book by Carl Djerassi, I must admit that never has a book evoke so many thoughts, and so much emotions before. It paints a ficticious story of politics in the academic field, relating every scientist's hope of winning a Nobel Prize to the highly competitive fighting arena of getting one's work recognized in the most prestigious journals.
There were numerous recurring themes in the book. From the supervisor-subordinate relationship to the issue of the proper acknowledgement of credit, from the importance of social networks to the romantic relationships that get complicated because of academic-related issues, it's ironic that this fictional piece of writing illuminates the reality of the academic world in its entirety. Fame, acknowledgement, status, information, and dominance in the field - which scientist (or mathematician) would not want?
This novel has succinctly elucidated the complexity of research as a profession, especially when big dreams and ambitions are attached to it. Yet, it also reminds us of the glaring truth that sometimes fate is not for you to control.
Not everyone has an aptitude for research, and there are people who spend years doing research but get no results. As they toil away, running weeks of computer simulations, or conducting numerous experiments on petri dishes, waiting for the simulation to yield more efficient results, or waiting for that one sample that will confirm their hypothesis, they know that mere hard work does not suffice.
Yet, even if we have that bright spark in us, or if we are just lucky to make that one significant discovery to secure our PhD, brilliant results do not correlate to recognition. Your supevisor is either your sweet elixir of success, or your bitter pill of doom, and while you can get to choose your supervisor, you cannot choose his work ethics or moral integrity. If he gives you due recognition for your hard work and results, then good for you. But if he chooses to claim credit for your research, what can you do? Bitch and whine about him behind his back? Stick needles into a voodoo doll of him?
Politics are but one part of this complex equation. Another important aspect of research is the issue of motivation. What motivates you to go into research? Everyone who decides to pursue an academic career must answer the very fundamental question of why he or she wants to do so. Is it the idealistic satisfaction of challenging oneself to the limit, and finally seeing results? Is it the noble aspiration of helping mankind one day with your research? Is it the materialistic need of finding wealth and status? Or are you just jumping on the bandwagon to capitalise on what could be the next big thing - biomedical research?
Even if your motivation is purely idealistic or noble, would you know what to expect when your hopes and aspirations are filfulled? What if we had set out to fulfil our dreams, achieve something in life, only to find that we have been chasing after something that is far too glorified? What if we climb up the mountain of success, finding ourselves at the highest peak only to realise that that is the end - the last obstacle to be conquered?
Not everyone has a dream, a goal, or a direction in life. But if we do, we better understand what our dream entails. A coin has two sides, just as with everything else. Things will not be as glorious as they seem when we consider their negative aspects, and this juxtaposition of innocent idealism and brutal reality will only serve to mould the impressions we have of research as a career. As we conquer obstacles day by day, extending our sights beyond the vast desert plains of the trials and tribulations of adaptation and survival, towards the oasis of hope and spiritual fulfillment, we must still be prepared for what there is to come. For that oasis of hope might just be a water-hole, guarded by poisonous scorpions and venomous snakes, who had similar dreams as you.
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4:39 PM
Updates of Cornell Life II
Thursday, November 09, 2006
Ok, this is not the first time this sort of thing has happened. I suspect this girl in my class is interested in me. (See previous entry "Updates of Cornell Life" on 8th Sept 2006) Well.. she's invading into my comfort zone, and I feel a little weird talking to her. She's like sort of over-enthusiastic in talking to me, and me only. I don't like it.
Why must this happen to me again?? 1 traumatic experience is enough..
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10:59 PM
